The Exchange of a Recommendation
Why we should treat recommendations with care.
A few months back, a good friend of mine recommended a book to me. It was a simple enough recommendation - just a "thought you should check this out" in passing. So, I got my hands on a copy of the book and read it. After that, I got back with this friend and we discussed the book.
This might seem like an innocuous enough exchange - but two things about it stuck with me:
First, when I followed up to discuss the book - my friend was genuinely surprised I had actually gotten a copy and read it. (Apparently he has recommended this book to many others and, to his knowledge, only me and one other had actually followed through on the recommendation)
Which led to the second - there's a subtle, often overlooked "exchange" that happens every time a recommendation is made:
On the part of the person making the recommendation - we offer something up to the other person. We put ourselves on the hook for not only the thing being recommended, but also our knowledge of what the other person would benefit from. We're willing to put a stake in the ground and say "This is worth your time and I believe I know you well enough to think it'll resonate". Recommending something that isn't good is, well, not good. And recommending something that is good, but to the wrong person, isn't a useful recommendation at all.
On the part of the person receiving the recommendation - we agree to take on the unspoken obligation of the recommendation. Assuming we trust the person making the recommendation to us, we owe it to them to, at a minimum, consider their recommendation.
This isn't to say every book, movie, podcast, product, or vacation destination recommended must be read, watched, listened to, purchased, or traveled - but we should handle recommendations with care: both when giving and when receiving.
And in that spirit, here's my list of "Required Reading" - a few books I've found worth recommending
Thanks for spending time with me in my workshop,
Eric
